Brett Favre Reportedly Has 7.5 Percent Body Fat And Arms Like A Blacksmith

MOBILE, Alabama – Bus Cook doesn’t want to start any rumors — he’s been down that road enough, thank you very much — but he has never seen Brett Favre look better.

Hold the phone. Before you think Favre’s agent is dropping hints about yet another return to the NFL for the former Southern Miss standout, think again. He’s merely making an observation.

Still, it’s an interesting one.

“Today, he could play today,” Cook said Monday night before his appearance as guest speaker at the New Horizons Credit Union-1st & 10 Club meeting at Heron lakes Country Club. “I saw him the other day. He’s in the best shape I’ve ever seen him in, physically.

“His arms look like a blacksmith’s arms. He rides a bike probably 30-50 miles a day. He runs four or five miles a day. He’s coaching at the high school and they’re undefeated. He loves it. His body fat is 7.5 percent and he weighs 225 pounds. He could play today, better than a lot of them out there today.”

In speaking about Favre, the player who started Cook in the business of representing athletes, Cook said it isn’t the physical gifts that separated Favre from the others. Instead, it was his passion for the game.

You know what that means? Cccccccomeback! Vintage Favre right here. Hey no one has said my name in a while, everyone is sucking off Peyton Manning and all the new quarterbacks, Bus why don’t you go tell everyone how much I bench and remind them that I could come back if I wanted to but I don’t, but I COULD (make that last part really clear).

He’s like a zombie. He’s dead but he’s still alive. It’s actually uncanny. And honestly, I want him to comeback, because he’ll get murdered and we can all make dick pic jokes again and laugh at old man Favre until he retires and then waits a few years to comeback again.

Has anyone checked in on Ed Werder yet? He must have the hardest cock in America right now.